(en) The Worst of Both Worlds
I made a post on how I can’t read and am actually ill-suited to my college program (Japanese Literature) about three years ago. THREE YEARS? Wow. I made that post in my third year and I still haven’t graduated…
Er, sad emoji face aside… I didn’t read (as in read books that aren’t lesson workbooks/textbooks) nor write (as in putting my thoughts into words and not just re-explaining facts and theories using my own language) much back in high school. Maybe it was because it’s a technical high school, or maybe it was because it was a bad school (lol please don’t cancel me), I dunno. Anyway, I’m not as literarily literate as my Japanese Literature peers.
I’ve always blamed the fact that studying software engineering has geared my head to think in this certain “systemic” way (whatever the fuck that means lmao) that’s not really compatible with literary arts. It’s always a struggle, even now, to write down my thoughts into a coherent, understandable form. But I’ve realized that it’s not because of my educational background, I’m just plain retarded.
There may be a little truth to that assumption, though. What I write in my pull request description and commit messages is long and got bits of personal thoughts mixed in, different to how my other coworkers, who actually studied engineering in college, don’t do that. So maybe there actually is something different in how Japanese Literature majors think and write compared to how Information System majors do. My technical high school background made me a misfit for college, and being from a Literature faculty in college made me a misfit in an engineering team.